


deep in my ears

by seesawthefourth



Series: singularity [8]
Category: SHINee, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Somewhat, arabian jasmines grow in my yard, birds also make a cameo, can this be called cottagecore?, crying face, everything is hinted at, great, homophobes are not welcome, i guess, its old fashioned, jimin just wants to pick flowers, kim jungwoo (NCT) makes a cameo, now read my pride and passion, oh and people are dead, read this, that does not make any sense, them included, they live in cottage obviously, this is the whole story, thus jimin like arabian jasmines now, who knew you couldn't have fun with tags on mobile, yet they are part of this fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:20:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25288225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seesawthefourth/pseuds/seesawthefourth
Summary: jimin wants to pick flowers, hoping that it might make taemin happy.
Relationships: Lee Taemin & Park Jimin (BTS), Lee Taemin/Park Jimin (BTS)
Series: singularity [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1155971
Kudos: 2





	deep in my ears

**Author's Note:**

> i was sad hi

their cottage with it's munitioned windows and rickety floors and broken back door is always open to guests. guests who he knows will never venture this deep into the forest and find the picturesque house for two in a floral meadow. but he still dreams in between mint teas and hot buns.

they are hoping to big, jimin knows but he doesn't have a heart to tell taemin that. his lover would loose that infectious -though a little bit unhinged - smile of his and no way was ruining his days like this.

days on which taemin is happy is rare, weeks and hours in which he covers himself with all their blankets and quilts and even their bedroom curtains once, just so he could hide himself away.

these episodes though were getting more and more prominent as the shivering whip of cold and shedding leaves enveloped their small forest. he knew because the older held his hand a little bit tighter then before, cuddled against him throughout the nights and drank soup straight out of the warm bowl.

" taeminie let's pick flowers ! ", he said one day, surprising both of them. he was smiling - pleading that taemin would smile back at him - but taemin didn't share his enthusiasm. he ignored him, completely, striding up the stairs and into his bedroom. jimin follows, flopping down on the bed beside him.

"taeminie". he calls, hands outstretched towards the older, waiting and  waiting and waiting. but again the older ignores him, sitting on the floor as he pulls out boxes from under his bed, the cardboard dusty and dark under his fingertips.

jimin pouts, calling out again and again and again, growing increasingly frustrated with his lover as time goes by and the sun settles down in blue and purples. his voice keeps getting louder and louder, screaming and yelling until taemin neck snaps his way, his eyes narrowed to a glare.

taemin doesn't get angry that easily, he knows but suddenly he doesn't know what to do but shuts up and stares and taemin pushes the items in the boxes out and on the floor, notebooks, scattered old pictures of them when they lived in the city, taemin's old belongings and many other rickety things he hadn't even known they had. 

"taemin". he calls again when the older had stopped and was scowling at the boxes, his voice turning softer as he reaches towards the older man again. " let's go pick flowers". 

his lover keeps glaring, trying to drill holes into the old wood. he reaches forward, wishing to pull him away from the pictures he kept glaring at. the picture isn't worth it anyways, it's them before they both the home, before jimin 's family had caught up to them and they are happy and smiling into a camera they definitely couldn't afford. he wonders where they got it and the thought's gone as quickly as it came because taemin to getting up. 

"let's go pick flowers taemin". he says. taemin gives him a glance and his hands seems to shake. he nods, hesitantly moving through the mess he had created to down the stairs. jimin follows him, leaving the room in the disarray taemin had left it. 

the cottage has a mud thatched roof, and stone walls covered in moss. there's windows, four of them on each side, spilling ample light in the morning. taemin likes candles and natural light and sometimes which now seems eons ago taemin would drag him outside to the stone pathway and to the flower garden they had added to the otherwise wild flowers. 

he would lay, watching the sun turn darker and darker, many times holding his cold hand and cuddling into him. it was normal, easy and jimin would forget his obession with having someone visit them. 

they were better alone, he had always thought. far away from judging eyes, questioning glances and armful of hurtful comments. and anyways there were deer and frogs and butterflies in the forest, a forest and bear near the den where fishes resided in a small pond. 

they were home and yet - 

taemin looked put out, pushing his hand away from where he was lying on the grass. it was freezing and taemin with his warm clothes and listless eyes blurring into a dark night was concerning. 

his fingers are digging into the soft dirt, dangerously close to uprooting an arabian jasmine he had urged him to plants moons ago. they now seemed to shine in front of their counterparts, the almost larkspur and roses. 

they are white and small and dull in the morning with a smell so beautiful that taemin would bring them in when they bloomed and put them on a plate in the kitchen. it made the whole cottage smell sweet and enchanting, like they were truly living a dream jimin had envisioned back in the city. 

he reaches forward to pluck one, hold it directly in front of his nose, smiling. seconds pass and he closes his eyes, loosing himself into it enough that he feels like he's blurring into the landscape.

a touch startles him, taemin's hand coming to thread them together. his smile widens and he tells him again. "let's pick flowers taemin". 

he opens them and taemin's nodding. his attention in fully on him and he reaches forward to grab both of his hand in between his own, blowing warmth into them. 

they're still cold. 

jimin's still smiling when taemin turns to pick flowers with him, he wonders if they'll go inside to cut them properly and put them on the windowsill. they'll look pretty there, overlooking their flower garden and small forestry friends. 

taemin turns to place a flower in the dip above his ear, brushing his hair back to put it. his hands stop there and he thumbs at the soft flesh right where his hair begins. the smile he gives him is soft and nostalgic, the smile falling apart when jimin doesn't reciprocate. 

there's an ache rising in his chest, something coming up and up his throat until he can only grimace. he reaches the lone arabian jasmine to his lover, placing it on his palm when he extends it. 

it's then he notices the bird chirping, nudging at flowers they are picked. taemin leaves them after he rubs the birds head, giving him a wave when he moves to stand up. jimin watches his figure retreat in the house, hoping that he'll join him outside again. 

this might be the biggest event which had taken place in weeks and he was going to get as much out of it as possible, even something told him that the smiles were more a grimace then anything else. they were too sad and jimin wanted taemin to be happy, needed him to be.

jimin had always loved flowers, having met taemin in a flower shop and later working in one once high school had finished and his mother couldn't work anymore. it had lead him to make plans to grow a flower garden in the future, with sunflowers and peonies and daisies in his own orchid. 

he plays with the bird until taemin returns. his steps are light and hesitant and jimin wonders why he stops a few steps away him. he should sit right beside him and watch the sunrise with him. 

"jimin". his breath gets caught up and the burning feeling in his chest grows. it has been a while since he had called him by his name. 

something tells him to not turn and yet he does, waiting for taemin to say something. maybe his name, again and again and again like a lullaby lulling his heart back to calmness. 

taemin is standing, an almost blank expression on his face. there's that smile again, underneath the mask he tries his best to pull up. 

jimin grabs a rose, pushes it to him like a peace offering. "let's pick flowers taemin". he wants this moment to go on and on and on, ignoring that the ache is turning bothersome. 

the words, to his horror seems to break taemin and his lover collapses onto his knees. there's a newspaper clutched tightly in his hands, balling it into his fists and the tears dripping onto it isn't helping him understand what's going on. 

he lurches, his arms coming to wrap around taemin and pull him into his embrace but it only makes him cry harder. he sobbing by now, stumbling over his words and shaking against him, breaking down like he was nothing but a leaf of a flower. 

he pulls him in tighter. 

but all of a second he's pulling away, biting at his lips to keep the sobs away. jimin's chest hurts and his hands seem to tremble from where they rest on taemin's shoulder.

the smile is back, though jimin notes with satisfaction that there's happiness in it. acceptance maybe. relief that it was finally alright. 

taemin lets go if the newspaper, letting jimin grab for himself. the texture is rough, the paper in black and white and a date of _1905_ set in the name of the company. it's the company from his district, the one owned by the old grandfather who smoked pipe in front of the pizza parlor. 

the newspaper seems to fall away, when he notices that at the end of the paper there's a picture, _his_ picture with _his_ name. 

he looks up and taemin is crying through the tears and his hands rest in his knees. his heart hurts, so so much and the newspaper falls to the ground. 

taemin seems to read him and reaches as to pull him closer but his hands come empty and his tears wetting the ground he kneels upon. "it's going to be okay".

it has spread everywhere by now and his brain feels like exploding, though his words somehow reassure him and the ache lessens a little.

the birds have gone silent behind him though the sun still rises, casting light into taemin's eyes. 

he can't see himself in it. 

"i love you". taemin chokes and he gone, fading away like he was nothing, like he meant nothing at all. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


y _ears later when kim jungwoo reaches the lone cottage deep into the woods, there's a marked and one unmarked grave set to each other like age old flowers, surrounded by a field of white and colorful flowers._

**Author's Note:**

> two truths, one lie :  
> i ugly sobbed writing this  
> kim jungwoo has been asked to plant more arabian jasmines  
> i don't like chicken


End file.
